If you ask anybody about what makes a strong
and good relationship, you will often hear: “trust it is!”. It’s hard to
disagree with that statement, isn’t it? Regardless of what we are talking
about, is it a relationship between an employee and his employer, between two
companies or between husband and wife, it would be impossible to cooperate
without trust. If there was no trust between, let’s say, a boss and an
employee, the employee would probably never get any assignment or, even better,
would never be employed in the first place.
That sounds obvious but are things really
that simple? While I agree, that trust is essential in establishing any kind of
rapport, I strongly believe, there is another factor that is equally or even
more crucial. Actually, it is the trust’s evil twin – distrust.
At first it might feel a bit weird, because
you may think “how can trust be equally important as distrust? If you trust
somebody, you cannot distrust him at the same time!”. Well, I believe you can.
Let’s look at the human nature. Are people
naturally good or bad? If all people were good and virtuous, then we could
trust anybody. If all people were false and selfish, then we would trust
nobody. Simple enough. Too bad the world isn’t that simple. Some people are
trustworthy, some are not. In that case, isn’t it better to distrust all people
by default? If you don’t believe in other people’s words by default, then
nobody can trick you.
What I’ve said might sound familiar for
those who heard about Niccolo Machiavelli. Machiavelli was an Italian diplomat,
politician and writer of the Renaissance period, best known as the author of “The
Prince”, where he described the “proper” ways princes should govern their
lands. Machiavelli claimed, that people are generally “ungrateful liars and
deceivers greedy for profit” and the prince should always keep it in mind.
Nowadays, this Renaissance writer is infamous and disrespected by many. At the
same time, are we actually that different from Niccolo Machiavelli?
Every business we make is based on
distrust. When I go to the shop, at least one camera is observing me – shop owners
don’t trust me, apparently. When a person applies for a job and gets it, both
the employee and the employer have to sign an employment contract. Nations keep
their armies even if there is no real threat. The distrust is a very important
part of any relationship, as it lets us assure, that we end up winning, not
losing. It’s our airbag. If we don’t have it, we risk our businesses, our
lifes.
We often say that Machiavelli was cynical and
ruthless. At the same time, we set up all kinds of safety measures in our lives.
Doesn’t it mean, that Machiavelli was actually right about human kind?
Questions for you:
1. Do you agree that distrust is
important to business and life in general?
2. Do you agree that it’s safer to
assume that all people are dishonest and greedy? What can such belief lead to
in life?
3. Have you read Machiavelli’s “The
Prince”? What do you think about it or the author?
If you agree or
disagree with any of the statements in the article, please express it in the
comment section.
Comments
Sometimes it's safer, because you can prevent some unwanted situations to happen in your life but mostly I think it's easier. If you don't want to build any relationship it's ok, you may not trust many people. But life without some emotional bonds is flat and meaningless. You should have at least a few people you can trust.
When it comes to business, it's crucial to have distrust. When money is in game everything is possible. Companies want profit, not friends.
Unfortunately, I've never read "The Prince" and don't know much about the author but after your article I think it will change.
Answering a secon question, I want to say that "assume" is a very right word in this case. If you know about the possibility of some event, you can prevent it or use it for your own good. It is nothing but simple carefulness.
I haven't read "The Prince" but it seems that I realy need to. It looks like a good material to think about.
I don't think that assuming that all people are greedy and dishonest is sane. We can't judge everyone by the same standards, everyone is different. This approach may lead to a lot of misunderstandings and people feeling unfairly misjudged.
I didn't read that book, but I think it would be worth reading. Machiavelli had a really strict perception of the world, which wasn't exactly the best. He had gotten a lot of things right though and I think that his works are worth checking out.
I highly recommend "The Prince", this is a book that opened my eyes on many fields. I've read quite a few books about war and politics, like "Art of War", "Anthropology of War" or "The Book of Five Rings", and "The Prince" is the one I like the most and I believe it's the easiest one to read and understand.
Thank you very much for your comment!
Thank you for your comment!
I've read some Machiavelli's books. It worth to mention that he was studying Rome's history to gather the whole knowledge about war and politics. I also think the best proof, we are not able to totally dedicate ourselves to live by rules found in his books, is Machiavelli himself who didn't live by them and life wasn't the best he could have.
First of all I think that “distrust” is very strong word. I think that being cautious and not fully believe anybody may be beneficial, and really important in business, but to distrust everybody? I think that it’s just a little paranoid.
I don’t assume that all people are dishonest and greedy, but I believe that people act just to benefit themselves in some way. I’m just skeptical that anyone would do anything good for me just because he/she is a good person.
I haven't read Machiavelli’s “The Prince” but I respect the author. I don't agree with his opinion about humans but his opinion was based on facts- he was well educated and I belive that he was trying to understand the world around him. His observations leads him to conlcusion that people are "ungrateful liars and deceivers greedy for profit”. And it comes from his experience.
But people should understand who is honest and who is liar.
I don't like to talk about politics. But this is the best example where everyone trusts each other.
But i believe that the future will be better, and everyone will be trusted.
Between realism and idealism in any realm is a chasm man cannot overcome. Who amongst us is without “dirty hands”? Politics may head the list but in any walk of life be it trade, science, show-business or business, we all had our hands soiled once in a while, for idealism fades when realism looms.
I don't like word 'distruct;, I prefer 'limited trust', but no matter how it is called I believe that this is important. It is important to control it - your distrust. You can't follow everyone and check everything they do. What is more, you can't let distrust make you crazy. You have to control it, you can't let it be the most important.
On one hand, you can't just assume everyone lies every time they talk to you, on the other hand, believing in obvious lies makes you look stupid and gullible. If you feel the person is lying to you, do your own research, or ask someone else about that person- you don't have to cut all ties with those people or get mad at them. Just don't listen to them, or don't take their opinion into account.
In business, distrust is crucial - My manager always says "its better to have one more copy of a document, than not have one, maybe crucial, document". Every month we can hear about people selling their houses by signing some papers they don't fully (or at all) understand "but this nice man on the phone said we will get money/win a car/protect your future". Meh, "signing shady documents"- We still have those dumb ads all over the internet, telling gullible visitors that they've just won something! If those ads are still popular, then they must have some impact on people...
As for the book, I'm looking forward to reading it, as soon as i'll have some free time.
Politics is a good example of how important distrust is. Politicians promise us many things but don't keep those promises. If we had any tool to make them keep those promises, we would live in much better world. Right now, we are not allowed not to trust politicians and that's a big problem.
In general I'm trying to give people a credit of trust, sometimes it ends badly but I still have faith in goodness of newly met people.
I read only selected chapters from "The Prince" in high school. Unfortunately, I don't remember enough to comment on it.
I think that I'm a distrustful person and I like it. I don't want to be disappointed in somebody and when I'm meeting new people, I'm very careful.
I've never read “The Prince”, I hate politics!
2.I experienced on my own what is dishonesty. So, for now I have only a close circle of people, whom I trust. I always check the new people in my life if I can trust them or not.
3. I have never read the prince and I am more into the fantasy books.
People in different ways try to get into higher positions, better paid work. It requires from people to trust their mates only as far as it's needed. I don't agree with the Machiavelli's thesis at all.
Being dishonest in my opinion is unprofitable because of many reasons. People can recognise easily that someone who is fake. Usually their instincts tell them to stay away from such people, because there is a high risk that same can happen to them. I have read on some websites that it's better to be honest, reliable and above all punctual. Above mentioned traits people like in others and according to my life experiences it's true. I haven't read any Machiavelli book so I can't comment on it.
It is safer to assume that all people are dishonest and greedy but good luck living such a safe life. Havn't read Machiavelli's The Prince although this article made me curious about it, might try it.
And yet, I can’t say that Machiavelli is wrong. If you always trust every person you meet, nothing good will come of it. People must learn from their mistakes. After all, one in ten, maybe a rascal. Unfortunately, we cannot write on the face, whether we are good or bad. The bank doesn't spread the money on the tables, in the hope that we are all honest.
I didn’t read the Machiavelli’s works. But I think that he is worthy of respect because we remember and know about him half a century after his death. And since he had achieved so much, it was unlikely that he was a particularly trusting and kind person. History has repeatedly shown us that the winners have teeth to gnaw their way.