Skip to main content

Week 7 [6.05 – 12.05.2019] Why is it hard to be a man in modern, western society?


Throughout the history women were frequently discriminated or their laws were denied just because they were weaker physically than men. These dealings are changing for better in the modern world. In most developed countries women are equal to the man in the light of the law, etc. But sometimes ‘equality’ may be pushed too hard making life of other gender more difficult than it should be.

General views in the society are putting more and more pressure on men. A lot of completely normal behaviors are starting to be unacceptable. People are pinning on them all the sins their ancestors committed. It is becoming to be uncomfortable just to be something you can’t control. Even results from different public polls where saying that majority of people think men are more discriminated and have harder lives nowadays.

Let’s start with how media pictures modern man. You often see commercials in TV where husband is a slouch and can’t do any simple task and then woman comes and rescues him from his miserable existence. This represents man as a less intelligent and useless human being. This is deleterious because it treats men differently just for a sake of marketing. No one would want to be pictured as inferior human.

To be considered a respected man everyone expects from you not to express emotions and act “manly”. It is embarrassing to see a man crying or shouting. You have to have full control of your feelings in order to be viewed as mentally stable. Expressing yourself emotionally makes a man sound weak.  This is example of double standard because it’s okay for women to cry or to be angry and everybody feels empathetic towards them. 
    
Over 40% of victims of physical domestic abuse are male but almost all shelters for victims are women-only. A man doesn’t want to admit to being abused because this shows weakness and isn’t manly. No one wants weak man. People beaten by women are often laughed at and there are no repercussions for the female abuser. 

Also, there is no clear picture of what is to be a man. Difference in roles between man and women faded. A lot of manly character traits are no longer expected or desired. It creates world where you have no the brightest idea how to act or behave.

This shows that we are separating ourselves from the equal society we wanted to created. We shouldn’t treat people differently no matter their gender because it tells nothing meaningful. It’s time to dismantle feminism and its male equivalents and treat everyone like a human.





Questions:
1.    What examples of double standards can you tell?
2.    How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
3.    Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?






Sources:

Comments

1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
I have recently seen a contest consisting in submitting a candidacy and some project. The reward was well-paid internships. In the top three, two women were in first and second place, the third position was occupied by a man. Women were awarded points for being a woman. If not, the man would be the first.
2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
I understand equality in a fairly simple way. for me as an employer, it would not matter if the candidate is a man or a woman. Only qualifications would count. If, for example, I was running a transport company and needed a driver, then the main requirement would be to obtain a truck driver license. If a woman would have it and make a responsible impression on the conversation, I would definitely prefer to hire her than a man who seems to be crazy and vice versa
3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
I think that if someone has harder or easier life depends only on the person and not on gender. Of course, there are characteristics and gender-specific problems, but they can be considered as advantages or disadvantages depending on the situation
Nataliya Tkach said…
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
If there is a vacancy for a leadership position, it is likely to be given to a man, as most opinions that women will be guided by feelings, not common sense. This, of course, is absurd, since men get more money for the same position as women.

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
Can achieve equality, but we subconsciously instilled that female homemaker and a male breadwinner. And if at some family on the contrary, for us the man is not a man, woman a man in a skirt.

3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
I think women are more delicate. They should work, give birth and raise children, keep the house clean and ending with cooking for the whole family. Most men will say that it does not matter what gender, because they were not in place of women.
C'mon, it is still way easier to live as a man from a physical point of view. Like, your genitals do not bleed monthly, your emotional pattern is naturally way more stable, your brain operates on a higher level of logic, etc. All of this is hard coded in nature and you cannot do anything about it. Over time everybody realized it, and just got over it. But then came this massive psychosis with feminism, equality, anti racism, lgbt, etc. All of this has one thing in common: while being well reasonable, and actually needed concept, it all went too far, way beyond the point of sanity. The male's rights are now being oppressed as a result of overexxagerated feminism, white people actually have less rights than other races (for example, the N word -- it is considered not ok to be pronounced by white people. So some group of people is forbidden for doing something based only on their skin color. It ACTUALLY DEFINES RACISM.), and non straight people already have way more privilege. It is clear that everything went out of control, but it will not last like that for long. Although, the means of restoring everything will, Imo, be as well far past the point of being ok.
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
I did not have frequent contact with some double standards, but it happened once that I saw a man being penaltied by police officers for the same offense, for which the woman received only an instruction. However, I had no contact with direct incidents.

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
The best way out for gender equality? Let's stop living stereotypes and pin patches on people. Everyone is different, but everyone should be equal in terms of sex. If a woman wants to create her own business, make herself or create something new for herself, nobody should interrupt her. The situation is similar for men.

3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
It is a difficult issue. Some women are certainly more delicate than men, which means that they are less tolerant of adversities in life. Stereotypes also do not simplify life for women. If I were to say straight who has a harder life, I would definitely say women.
Bartosz Barnat said…
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?

I can't tell because I didn't see any situation like that personally.

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?

I guess they should stop telling everybody that we are so different and one gender should do this type of work and other something else. We are all equal and we all are capable of doing what we want and be however we want and we should start acting that way.

3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?

Well Women had harder life in the past but right now there is so many #meeToo or feminism events and campaigns that Men can be easly interpreted in the wrong way and they will be simply bullied for a bad interpretation. Other thing is that Women are normally more vulnerable so when Women want to make a mess in mens life they simply lie about something and everyone would believe them just because of this #metoo. There is many articles about that but it's hard to say because there is bad sides when you are the man and the woman.
Yana Lytvynenko said…
This is quite a provocative topic. I will try to answer her purely with my opinion. I have always been equal to the rule between a man and a woman and really believe that it is not something that will be in the future, it already exists in some countries. But besides, in order to express an opinion and demand something, it is necessary of course to comply with this. On the part of a woman: she should be an individual self-fulfilling person and be able to provide for herself and answer for herself, just like a guy. And only in this way, with some kind of relationship, they can be really equal in rights, and as for me, we should strive for this.
1. I understand the subject but I do not have an idea for such an example now.
2. Perfect equality does not exist. I do not think it would be possible to achieve.
3. I do not know if it can be answered. Everyone has different problems.

I understand the problem more or less, but now I have no idea for such an example.

It seems to me that gender equality is difficult to achieve. There used to be gender equality before the machines for plowing the field were invented, because then there was a lot of power and the woman would take care of the house at home. Unfortunately, it took a long time for the scheme to become permanent. now women are demanding their rights and I have the impression that now women have more power and they talk a lot about them. Dear Ladys, please do not make our mistakes! ;)

It seems to me that women can have more difficulties after all. Besides that they work, they still take care of children and cook for the whole family. Perhaps it is different, but I say as it seems to me.
There is no such thing as equality between the sexes, but there is equality in choosing your career and building your future. Unfortunately, some of society wants equality in results, which is why double standards are created. If our work is equal, why men must work 5 years longer than women. I think it is much harder to live as a woman who creates different conspiracy theories about gap wages and who blames her sex for all her failures in her career.
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?

Honestly, in my whole life, I haven't met with any examples of double standards. I have heard a lot about them on the net, but I think some examples could be overrated or a little bit "embellishment".

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?

I think people's behaviour should be independent of other's gender. All of us is a human being and all of us should be treated exactly the same way. It seems, that if everyone would be equal everything will be ok.

3. Who do you think to have a harder life? Men or Women?

I think it depends. It depends where to do your life, in which society, community, country, your job etc. As far as I know, there exist some countries, where women's are treated not as human beings and as a result they have fewer rights than man. On the other hand, there are modern countries, where everyone should be equal, but we see double standards. Maybe, the "hardest" of life doesn't depend on your gender, but on your life decisions.
Hmm, for double standars I would say perception of flirting when person is handsome/pretty and ugly one. People feel flattered when attractive person approach them and offended when they are not interested in.
I don't think that there is no equality now. There are some people who treats other genders unfair but I think it is small percentage, I am sick of hearing all the time that women are paying less, etc.
I can't answer that question as it is to hard to tell. Men are obligated to work hard, earn money, build a hous etc. it is hard for us to fulfill requirements of society, the same thing is for women.
The most obvious one is "man doesn't cry". When you see woman that do you feel sorry. But when man do in most situations it is pathetic. After all i don't really care about them and i never rate people. When it comes to equality, hmmm i think extrems are caused mostly by sexist people that remember times when it was unthinkable for woman to work but times are different. However I think Woman still have harder life and it is mostly caused by biology not about laws and other people.
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
I am a very nice driver but my friends never allowed me to drive their cars ( they would rather take an Uber and stuff) because they did not believed that girl can drive good.
2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
They can't and they won't. We are still unequal an we can do exactly nothing about it.
3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
Women. Because if you are a woman, people instantly think that you are dumb, you have no logic in your thoughts. You bleed once a month (sometimes more). Every time you are in a bad mood all men start to ask you: "Do you have PMS at the moment?"or Ïs it that time of the month already?" and this drives me crazy. Why I can not just be in a bad mood?
Also, you are instantly weaker, if you have dated more than 1 guy, it is bad. But if guy dated more than 1 girl - that's fine! Why? Were is that equality you have been talking about?
This is very strange subject for me and honestly I do not fully understand of it, so I can't answer your questions.
Anton Medvediev said…
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
have some interesting history for you, a week ago i met with my friend and we speak about some relationships, and i ask her about her, so she tell me that she had met a one man but he is so stupid, and she want only have sex and nothing they have 2 met and on 3 one she say okay come to me, and after it she block him and delete, i said the she is a witcher (sound like Beach), and you told me that man use women all time, and you did it, but she was surprised and dont understand,
and i said c’mon all is okay i had a sex with women and then she block and delete me i will think oh my god i am so bad:)i wont even think that she wondering only one night i will think about what i did.
and my friend say “ohh, i wish he was so stupid to think like that”
ohh sorry about mistakes, it’s last presentation and i dont want to think too much
2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
never
3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
All time i see that if u stupid u have a better life but if u have some brain u need to think and do something and it’s hard
but if u women and have a brain, life is more harder than if u are man with brain:)
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?

Unfortunately, this trend is growing. The court in 90% of cases will leave the child with the mother, and not with the father. And, frankly, I understand why this is so, but at the same time, it is impossible to judge all people by one example. Each situation must be considered separately.

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?

I am a girl and would not want this. I like a certain type of men, and if the border is erased I will be more difficult. Because I want to be a girl next to a man, and not next to another girl.

3. Who do you think to have a harder life? Men or Women?

I think that it is impossible to compare. The basic situations for us are the same. But we are different at the physical level and this border will be difficult to erase. One-time sex for a woman and a man can end in completely different consequences. A man forgets it on the next day, and a woman will remember all her life. This is a different degree of responsibility.
I have heard a lot about people sharing a strange society. There are dissatisfied women who ask for equality. But when you give her an ax and you say go to the forest for wood, she says that I am not a man to do such work. But in aspects that are beneficial to her, she will scream about equality. I am a man, I am 28 years old, all my friends from school are men who have a lot of problems, just like me. But all my friends girll from high school married a rich guy and feel good. It seems to me that there is some problem here. Decide for yourself, I only reason.
I cannot think of a example of double standards because i have never experienced one. Problably the closest i have ever been exposed to double standards are jokes about woman driving ability dispite the fact, that man causes more accitends then women. I think equality beetween genders is real, and we are living in times when it is possible to reach full equality. In my opinion, equality is archived when in law there is no distinction to gender. Peoples mindsets are diffrent story, because we cannot verify other peoples thoughts and cannot change other people, we can only educate children. I cannot say who has harder in life, men or women. I only experienced one path, but i know there are big diffrences. There are diffrences in our body shape, our preferences, our mindsets. These things are not myths, this is scientificly proven that these diffrences may influance our taste and choices in life. We, as a community, should adapt and accept our diffrences. There are no barriers, there is not a law that forbids woman of working as a e.g fireman and there are women firefighters, but typicaly man are more suited to intense physically work, thats why we have more man firefighters. It is not about equality, it is about our ability to perform certain tasks. For sure, people who tries to do opposite things that nature designed them to do, will have harder time in life.
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
Saudi Arabia women weren't allowed to drive a car until recently.
2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
I think that is not possible there will always be one of gender that want to dominate. Maybe there will be some short time equality, but this will end fast because do we really want equality? we always want more and more. Equality want only these that are not equal but later they will want more, and they will have many explanations why they should get more.
3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
It’s hard to say for me I think it’s depends on what definition you have on how hard life look for you.

ExoKuzo said…
Women and men are treated a little bit differently in workplaces, media, real life situations, like for example rape accusations if woman makes one she will be cared for and comforted, her claim will be treated as truth almost from the start, man? he will be almost laughed at, his side rarely takes priority, same goes for family abuse.
When it comes to getting equality, i dont think we can get equality in the sense ppl believe we want to get it. conscious equality is what we need, when we compare results of two 5 graders we have "baseline" they are both in 5th grade, but how about if one of them was in coma for past 3 weeks ? that makes the difference in order to achieve equality we need to take everything into consideration especially ones gender.
If i need an engineer for a job it should not matter what gender he/she has as long as i get an engineer suited for the job.
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?

There are double standards everywhere, for men and for woman. I don’t feel really competent to touch such a sensitive issue.

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?

I don’t think the true equality is possible, we are different and also we are humans, someone will be always complaining.

3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?

I don’t know really, I think that some people have more difficult life than the others, but to be honest I don’t think that gender is the main reason.
I can’t think of any double standard example at the moment.
I don’t think that perfect equality could ever be achieved because every human has his or her own opinion. This means that even if the law would be perfectly equal there will always be someone a man or a woman who consider his or her self as better than other gender for reasons known only to this person. For me man and women are equal but I’m sure that there is someone who thinks differently, and it will be almost impossible to change a point of view of every human in the world.
In my opinion women have much harder life then man. Why? For example pregnancy, I really admire everyone that went through this because I’m not sure if I would be able to. The other thing is traveling alone for example. It is much more likely that some criminal would attack a girl who has less physical strength then a big man and steal from her or do something even worse. Of course man and women have different pros and cons in different life situations but in general a life of a woman is harder then life of a man.
s18716 said…
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
A lot of example of double standards can be found everywhere. For example, if we also touch upon the sphere of relations between people, then we can consider cases in the relationship between parents and children. Parents reproach their children for not learning and criticizing them. But in most cases, the parents themselves are not ready to listen to criticism from children, and rarely think about the correctness of actions. Perhaps this is the first thing that came to my mind, since I recently participated in a discussion on this issue.

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
It seems to me one of the surest ways, is of course the adoption of equality at the legislative level. Recently watched the movie "On the Basis of Sex". I advise to view. This topic is covered there.

3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
It seems to me that if we consider this question, we will return to the issue of double standards. Most likely it depends on the individual position of each person in society, in the family, etc.
Personally I can find discrimination in a lot of things nowadays. Gender is only a part of this huge problem with standards and proper behavior that is created by society, media and culture. We have a lot of problem with understanding each other and we tend to depends on stereotypes rather then relate somebody. For me it's weird that you might be judged based on your gender or place of birth becouse we live in times where we should work on connecting with one another but we build walls and create hate in order to blame others for evil. I'm sorry I didn't answer your questions but in my opinion this topic is shallow and I feel that it's a tip of an iceberg. If you can say that men are being discriminated than you should be well aware that women have been long before and still are. There is no point in building differences asking who might felt worse or had harder times becouse we can find uneven situations all the time indifferently from the fact that we are all human beings.
The double standard, which I hear very frequently is "Race has no matter, but only white people can be racists". Another sad fact related with the article is that only 2%-3% of divorce cases in Poland result in father having full-custody over children.

By treating everyone equally, without making any favour to any gender. Women are valuable as much as men, we don't need any help, just more trust and faith in us.

And who has harder live, man in a woods or man in a city, who am I to judge this? I can tell you only that I earn exactly the same amount of money as my male-mates on the same position in my company. I can't tell you whether is it normal or unique.
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?
I can show an example of many families where husband and wife are "equal": they both work. But children are only wife's responsibility. Or, for example, each woman can be a programmer, but at most job interview she would hear a question "Our team consists of men. What you think about that?".
2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
We almost already achieved it. Now we should make much more less scenes about gender differences and do more.
3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
In my opinion, they are equal. We have the same value, but in different situations.
Maciej Sadoś said…
1.    What examples of double standards can you tell?
Unfortunately or fortunately nothing special comes to my mind.
2.    How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?
Kids from the beginning should be told that we are all similar and have equal rights and privileges.
3.    Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?
It's not that obvious to say that one is definitely harder than other but there are certainly some aspects of life that are easier for one of the genders.
Illia Lukisha said…
1. What examples of double standards can you tell?

I think that army is one of the indicators that something is wrong. In many countries only men are supposed to go to the army mandatorily, but women shouldn't. So if all people are equal why is that happening? The same is with children vacation, it's broad opinion that only women supposed to take that.

2. How do you think people can achieve equality between genders?

I think that all laws should be gender-free so all people will have equal rights. I think that the fact that men length of life is shorter because of inequality.

3. Who do you think have harder life? Men or Women?

I think that all of us have the same level of difficulty.
1. One of the first double standards that comes up to my mind is the different approach among employers towards maternal and paternal leave. Men are simply not even considered to want to spend valuable time with their newborns and are in majority of the cases granted a much shorter time. And yes, we may argue that they are not the ones giving birth but a lot of companies don't even have such thing like paternal leave.
2. I think we are still a long way from achieving equality between our genders but I believe that we are on a good path. Both women and men are starting to speak up about what needs to be changed for both sides to feel equally treated in all aspects of life.
3. It's a difficult question and depends on who do you ask. Being a man seems easier from a biological point of view- we don't have to give birth to kids, we're physically stronger and career-wise we still get some social advantages. But on the other hand women don't grow up constantly competing between each other, they are not considered a failure if they can't support an entire family by themselves, build a succesfull career, help around the house and kids- and if at any moment they slack at any of those they are perceived as weak or inconsiderate. They are also not judged for showing weakness or for showing their emotions. They are not constantly judged through a filter if something they are doing is “manly” or not. Therefore I believe this question is impossible to answer, both sides have it hard, somedays it's harder to be a woman

Popular posts from this blog

Week 1 (09-15.03) VOD

http://www.vod-consulting.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/1.jpg

Week 11 [03-09.06.2019] The problem with ecological cars emission in UK

The problem with ecological cars emission in UK Since the adoption of the European Emission Allowance Directive in the European Parliament, all car makers have tried to submit. Since 1992, the Euro I standard has been in force, which limited the emission of carbon monoxide to the atmosphere. The Euro VI standard currently applies, which limits the series of exhaust gases. These include: hydrocarbons, nitrogen and carbon oxides, and dust.   The most significant change was brought by the Euro IV standard. For the first time it introduced the limitation of nitrogen oxides, which are responsible for the harmful compounds of smog.   What is smog?   Smog consists of sulfur oxides, nitrogen and carbon. In addition, solid substances such as suspended dust (PM). Dust suspend in atmospheric aerosols may be in liquid and solid form. These can be particles of sea salt, clouds from the Sahara and artificial compounds made by people. These compounds often come fr

Week 4 [06-12.11.2017] This is what happens when you reply to spam email.

James Veitch is a British comedian. In today’s Ted Talk James with characteristic for himself a sense of humor shows how he deals with spam emails and why responding to junk messages may be sometimes dangerous. Questions: What do you think about James’s  way of dealing with spam? Why are junk messages legal, even though it sometimes may be a fraud? Dou you have a problem with spam? How do you deal with with it?